The Last Call

“Waiter, 1 Heineken here”, says Einstein.
“ Hai, one heineken for this sexy looking man”, says Boka
“Hey, you Asian dude, I called out first” says Einstein.
“Yo, chill man”, says Boka staring at Einstein’s girl friend.
“Whatchu looking at?” Says Einstein.
“Arrrre you blllind, ‘course at your girl chow men”, says Boka
“ You call me a CHOW MEIN, you murk” says Einstein.
“Yo, take it easssssy man, now if you’d excuse I’ve got some work to dooo”, says Boka walking to his girl “How you doin’ ?”
“ Yo, you wanna fight, you tiny winy china man.” Says Einstein turning red.
“ You think you are Mike Tyson”, says Boka “come let’s fight, you MORON.”


Boka and Einstein meet in a Bar in Toronto. It is the last call for drink and they both are verbally fighting to get the last glass of Heineken. Boka gets on Einstein’s nerves since he keeps on looking at his girlfriend. These two heavy drunk people continue arguing and at the same time Boka is trying to impress Einstein’s girl friend. Then Boka’s weird moves lead to a fight and the manager of the Bar comes in to stop them and Einstein’s girl walks out with the last Heineken.

Authors: Atif Ahmed and Toofan Ghaznawi

My Trip to Londonistan

This summer, I had a trip to Londonistan to meet some of my cousins whom I have never seen in my life before. Anyhow, I got on the plane in Pearson airport, and I was so happy that I was going to have the best vacation. Our flight was from Toronto to London which is approximately about eight hours long; actually it is one of the longest flights. My seat was pretty uncomfortable for me since I had a customer of size sitting beside me and she would go to the washroom every ten minutes or less. Despite the fact that I was very distracted, I decided to write a vomit draft of a short story which I still haven’t finished yet. At last, I arrived in Heathrow airport and the moment I stepped out of the plane I realized that London was nothing like Canada because every where I looked, I saw fluorescent tanned people. Finally, I met my cousin and I thought it would be fun to spend four weeks with her, but it turned out that she was worst than a twazzock and there was no way I could get a long with her. The best Vacation of my life was actually meant to be the worst Vacation.